Sunday, June 20, 2010

What Father's Day Means To Me

Spending the day with a beautiful woman who was both Mom and Dad to me since the day I was conceived defines Father's Day to me.


"God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers." - Proverb

I was birthed from an angel, but conceived by one of Satan's mignons. Love truly is blind and really, who would have thought that the "perfect" couple in High School (Star Athlete and Prom Queen) would birth a child, only to fall victim to the statistics and ultimately find themselves in uncharted murky waters? I mean, doesn't the general consensus by society teach us that love is supposed to be enough to make a relationship last?

Hardly fact by any stretch of the imagination I have come to learn in life.

In any case, needless to say, at the age of 2 years old I was without a biological father and my mother "chose" to raise me by "herself."

Two things I would like to focus on for a quick second are as followed:

  1. Like so many unfortunate children in this world who have been abandoned, my mother did not have to raise me once my father bailed. Therefore, I used the word "chose" instead of the words "was forced" by design.
  2. While my mother did raise me predominantly by herself, my grandparents played a major role in helping her get through the tough times. If she were lost at sea, they were her compass.

If I wanted to lie to you readers, I would sit here and tell you that I was the perfect kid and that raising me was easy. Suffice to say, I was quite the challenge; to be honest, I still am today. Still, despite my mother busting her ass at work and having to sacrifice furthering her education to raise me, she is the prototypical success story. She has gone from "rags" to riches and by riches I am not talking about money alone. There are so many ways in which she has been blessed and is wealthy beyond decimal points and zeros. As they say, "the Lord works in mysterious ways" and for the 31 years which I have been in existence, I have been the antithesis of most of the stereotypes which come with being an only child. I have stayed out of trouble and away from drugs. Sure, I had girlfriends at a young age; however, I have not gotten any girl pregnant. Now if you would please excuse me, I need to find some wood to knock on right quick.

"Knock! Knock! Knock! Knock! And one more for good measure - Knock!"

All of this is a credit to the fact that my mother transcended any and all paradigms of a single parent by allowing God into her heart - to give her the strength and guidance to keep me grounded - while also letting her parents (my grand parents - duh) guide her through life accordingly. While I could be worse off than I am, I am not because my mother was a damn good mother and father all in one.

She was like a churro with caramel inside - what a damn good combo!

Conversely, I could also be better off than I am, however, the fact that I am not is my own fault. Lord knows my mom has given me every opportunity to go to school and to better myself financially. It is my own stupidity and immaturity that when she told me to go left - I went right.

After all, isn't that how children are supposed to be? Aren't we supposed to rebel?

As I woke up this Father's Day, it was without hesitation that I knew I wanted to be with my mom. We enjoyed menudo and pozolle from "El Tepeyac" in West Covina, CA and had a nice talk about everything going on in my life and in hers. She and I butt heads all too often, but all-in-all I can honestly say that my mom is my best friend. You see, my grandfather played an extremely important role in keeping me grounded as well; after all, he was the closest thing to a father - next to my mom - that I had. Once he passed away a piece of me went with him, yet, I remained strong and grounded because my mom, to this day, remains both mom and dad. If anything happens to her I lose more than a mother. I lose more than a father. I lose my closest and best friend.

Straight up.

So as we watched "Valentine's Day" the movie today, had lunch, ran errands and I beguiled her into joining the Apple family by purchasing an iPod Touch, I caught myself getting a frog in my throat as they say. For it's moments like today that epitomize my mother as the role model so many at her work see her as and furthermore, it is days like today that quantify my love for her in my mind, to my heart, and within my soul; yet, still I struggle to codify the words to express the level of appreciation I have for her. Truly my fellow "Loungers" the one I need to thank is God for giving me the mother/father that I have.

So what does Father's Day mean to me?

It means I get to hang out with the only woman who has ever loved me unconditionally, while forgetting the fact that I did not have a dad around as I grew up.

As for a father figure, I had that in my mom, and in my grandfather, and so much more.

"All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That is his." - Oscar Wilde

What does Father's Day mean to you?

I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic.

5 comments:

Unknown said...

my father is the best i must say,he never gave up when he is in trouble and he is my real hero!!!
well hey happy father's day to you too!!!
your mom is beautiful!!!!

JANZ said...

I enjoy reading your posts! I just didn't have a chance to comment on some of them. I never knew my biological father either. But, my grandfather raised me, and he is the best father anyone could ever have. Because of him, my life is beautiful. I may have lost him last year, but he will always be in my heart and he will always be my one and only dad! :)

mdfix said...

I dedicate this song to my father You Raise Me Up from Josh Groban..

mdfix said...

I don't know where to put this suggestion, but i think u might wanna look at this..

http://keepyourmoneyup.blogspot.com/2010/06/chat-box-for-blog.html

Anonymous said...

YOU MADE ME CRY!!!!! rudeeeee

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